when you know you know

but I dont know.

I've been thinking hard lately. wondering. i ponder.
I assure my friends not to think so much about the future, "come on guys, just relax and rock this 3 months while u can", but I cant seem to do it, though i appear to be enjoying every bit of it. cause ahead me is unmapped territory. As I barrel down this highway, the unknown ahead is terrifying and tantalizing at the same time.

1. What awaits me??
2. Why do I have to study??
3. Why is it not possible to not study??
   
4. Why are there so many upS and downS in life??
5. Why do people have to leave, separate and die??
6. What did i achieved so far at the age of SevenTeen??
7. Why am i so fragile??
   
8. Why do i bruise easily??
9. Why cant i be a kid forever??
10. How much i hate growing up !
11. How much i hate falling down and climbing up again!



12. How much i hate giving worries to my parents !
13. How i wish things could be simpler.
14. Is there a chance in life when the time just freeze and stop ticking??



15. Why are there such words like "jealous", " fate", "destined", "break ups", "death" ...
16. I dont understand why I got so many 'whys'.
17. It's already 17, i shall stop being grumpy and be appreciative.

i will keep on praying!